On Calling People (Mitt Romney) Out

Before I begin this blog post, I need a moment for prayer.

Please, please, Cylon Jesus, please let this be the last blog post I ever publish about Mitt Romney. Please let this be the last blog post I ever have to write about Mitt Romney, Cylon Jesus. In other words, please make sure Mitt Romney loses the American election and I never ever hear about him again.

Please Cylon Jesus.

It’s my birthday soon, Cylon Jesus. Very soon. You wanna give me a present?

No more Mitt Romney.

That’s all I want, Cylon Jesus.

Well, that and a pony.

(take care of the Romney problem first, Cylon Jesus, okay, though? #IHavePriorities)

***

Okay, back to Mitt Romney.

Stitch, frustrated, Lilo and Stitch

*shudder* Not Him Again

A couple weeks ago, I got in a facebook argument on a friend’s wall. My Awesome Friend had posted an article explaining that Mitt Romney’s 47% speech included a racist dog-whistle (or ninety).

Another facebook dweller (henceforth known as of Acquaintance)  was not convinced that Romney’s remarks had elements of racism. We had a nice productive facebook argument about that, and at some point, Acquaintance concedes that yes, Romney’s remarks were probably racist.

So far so good, right?

BUT THEN, Acquaintance goes (and I’m grossly paraphrasing) “Well, okay, maybe it’s racist, but we don’t need to call out the racism. Critiques of Romney’s remarks based on classism are sufficient.”

Cristina Grey's Anatomy confused

Wait, what?

*headdesk*

To be fair to Acquaintance, he’s not the only person guilty of such argumentative doltishness. I’m sure you’ve heard variations of this theme before.

It’s the “yes, okay, Republicans are attacking gay rights, and that’s terrifically sad, but we can’t talk about that, because it’s divisive! And we don’t want to alienate any of our supporters.argument. Or the argument of: “well, yes, all those anti-welfare advertisements Romney’s campaign is running are highly racist. BUT it only helps Romney if we accuse him of being racist, because then they’ll say we’re playing the race card.”

Or: “Sure, Republicans are talking about taking away a woman’s right to birth control/abortion/her own body. But that’s controversial, so we can’t talk about it.”

So. With a little less than a week left before the election, let’s clear things up.

You know why you should call Romney out for being a racist? Or a sexist? or a homophobe? Or a terribly oppressive douchecanoe?

*clears throat*

Because when Romney’s a racist, or a sexist, or a homophobe, he’s attacking PEOPLE. PEOPLE. REAL PEOPLE.

POC and women and queer peoples are PEOPLE. They’re PEOPLE. And when they’re getting thrown under the motherfucking bus by a bunch of asswipe politicians, you STAND UP.

For crying out loud.

Darcy and Elizabeth Pride and Prejudice dance GIF

“Mr. Romney, you are a terrible oppressive douchecanoe, and I am STANDING UP to you.”

When you say racism isn’t important enough to call out, you’re tacitly saying that POC aren’t important enough to defend.

When you refuse to call out the war on women’s bodily autonomy, you’re basically saying that women aren’t important enough to stand up for.

When you let Karl Rove and his minions play the “Ooooh, scary gay people” game without saying anything back, you’re throwing queer people overboard and letting them swim with the sharks by themselves.

***

I’m white. I have white privilege. I don’t honestly know what it’s like to be a POC and to hear Romney’s racist dog-whistles. And I don’t want to appropriate that conversation. You should read these awesome links instead (they’re a great starting point for understanding the DEGREE to which racist rhetoric has invaded Romney’s speech)

Paul Ryan doesn’t like anchor babies (racialicious)

Rosie Perez goes in on Mitt Romney

The Problem With the Word Illegal

 

I am a woman, however, and I do know what it’s like to hear politicians talking about taking away my birth control; my right to an abortion. I do know what it’s like to hear men – men who control our country’s policy – say things like “legitimate rape” and “forcible rape.” I know what it’s like hearing that a pregnancy resulting from rape is a “gift from God.”

This is my body they’re talking about. My right to control my own body.

Fuck, it’s terrifying.

I can’t imagine it’s any easier to be a POC listening to Romney’s racist rhetoric.

My point, here it is: This isn’t dinner theater. These are people’s LIVES.

Moses running in front of Aliens, Attack the Block GIF

When someone’s getting chased by the monsters of oppression, you don’t just watch like it’s a movie.

Racism, misogyny, homophobia (to name the big three) kill people. Yes, in the United States. Yes, in Canada.  And when they don’t kill you, they still force you to live a life full of micro-aggressions and oppression.

Or they just make you live a life of misery and terror. [ask me about living a life full of misery and terror! I am a woman living in rape culture. I'm a fucking expert!]

When politicians use racism, or sexism, or homophobia, or any kind of oppression in order to gain political points, they’re basically saying that oppressed peoples matter so little that politicians can use their lives as political footballs.

Women’s rights to their bodies are not a political football. The right of POC to be treated with respect and without bigotry is not a political football.

It’s not a game.

And when we don’t call them out, we’re tacitly agreeing. it’s okay if women/POC/queers/minorities are batted around like catnip in front of a kitten! It just doesn’t matter that much.

No, it matters.

And it’s not about Romney. I get that people are like “well, he’s a gross asshole in nearly every way, so we really don’t need to list every horrible thing he does.” I get people who say “well, no matter what we say, he’s never going to stop being an oppressive douchecanoe.”

(which: Fair. I don’t think there’s much that’ll make Romney stop being an oppressive douchecanoe)

Cristina Yang GIF Grey's Anatomy

Except the wrath of the Yang

But it’s not about Romney. It’s about the people he’s attacking in his attempt to win the Presidency.

You don’t call Romney out because you think Romney will magically learn not to be an oppressive douchecanoe. You call him out because you think the rights of oppressed minorities are worth standing up for. You call him out because you don’t believe in leaving people out in the shark-infested water, getting attacked by a bunch of cynical politicians.

You call him out because it matters to me, damn it, as one of those people being attacked, to hear others supporting my rights. To know that I’m not alone. That someone will fight alongside me.

It’s not about Romney.

And it’s not just about douchebags like Romney either. I think most people who read this blog are progressive or liberal (or else you’d already be sending me hate mail), and it’s pretty easy for progressive, liberal people to go “Oh, yeah, Romney, that racist asshat, I can call him out!”

It’s a lot harder when it’s your heroes. It’s a lot harder when it’s your allies.

I’m thinking of Bill Maher, misogynist supreme, and comedic hero of much of the left. We can’t call him out! He’s on our side!

(no, you really can call him out. And you should)

I’m thinking of Hugo Schwyer, feminist hero. A man who has admitted to having raped a woman and tried to kill his girlfriend. A man who has harassed and dismissed women of color in the feminist movement. A man that many Big Name Feminist still defend. We can’t call him out! He’s a male feminist! Also, calling him out is divisive to the feminist community!

(no, you really can call him out. Also, you should SHUN HIM).

I’m thinking of feminists who ignore women of color, or who act like WOC’s concerns are something to take care of “later.” Or who are blatantly racist and who STILL don’t get called out, because the feminist movement is often REALLY SHITTY about the rights and issues of anyone who isn’t a middle-class western cisgendered straight white woman.

Yes, I love feminism. Yes, it’s one of the great axis around which my life turns.

But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t call feminist out when they exclude women of color, or when they’re racist. No, I should.

Hell, I’m even thinking of myself. I’m a huge bundle of privilege, and I’m still very much in the “screwing up” stage of anti-oppression work. And you know what? If I say oppressive stuff, or write oppressive stuff, or blog oppressive stuff, or if I’m being problematic?

I would take it as a MASSIVE favor if you would call me out. Sure, I’ll feel defensive for 30 seconds, and then I’ll get my head on straight. Other peoples’ right not to be oppressed is more important than my ability to feel comfortable in my discourse.

***

Now, look. There are good and valid reasons not to call people out.

First, calling people out takes a fuckmetric ton of energy (Fuckmetric tons: scientific measurement right there). It’s not easy. And a lot of times, it’s not safe either.

There are many circumstances where I don’t feel safe calling people out. One easy example: I don’t feel safe yelling at street harassers.

What if they turned on me? What if they hurt me?

There are also circumstances where I’m just too tired to call people out, especially when it’s about something that personally affects me (sexism, stigmatization of mental health issues etc). It’s emotionally exhausting, having to argue for your right to exist, and to be treated with respect.

Sometimes, I just can’t handle it.

So I pick my battles.

The other major reason not to call people out is when you might be appropriating someone else’s fight or adding to oppression. This especially applies to allies.

Be aware of the fact that in many spaces, your voice may be more privileged just by dint of the body you inhabit. Men have more privileged voices than women. White people have more privileged voices than people of color. You want to be sure that your calling people out isn’t, by dint of your privilege, excluding or disempowering the people you want to support.
(random example of me screwing this one up: this weekend, I got in another facebook argument, this time about the importance of Andrew Ti. I waded in to support my friend, who is a woman of color (I’m white). The white dude in the argument dismissed my friend as childish and hysterical. On the other hand, he listened to me and CHANGED HIS MIND. Least you ask, my friend and I were making almost exactly THE SAME ARGUMENT. Word for fucking word.  So yeah, my attempt to support a friend turned into another instance of “let’s disempower the woman of color.” Yeah, I screwed that one up)

[also, if you're not already reading Yo is This Racist? You should be.]

So yes, absolutely, there are good reasons not to call people out. But if you’re safe and secure and you know you’re not disempowering other people (except the racists – I fully believe in disempowering racists)?

And you choose not to do it, because of you just can’t be bothered?

Then dude, you suck.

Wonder Woman, injustice gods GIF

And the Wonder Woman will Rain Justice Down Upon You

Now, I’m not saying your suckiness is a permanent state. Let us note that I’ve been pretty damn terrible in my life at calling people out.

Yes, I suck!

But I’m working on it.

Call people out, everyone. NOT JUST MITT ROMNEY EITHER.

***

(Also, Cylon Jesus, if it isn’t too much to ask, I’d love to have my birthday night free of homework and stuff. No? Not possible? Okay, thanks for trying).

****
(hey, do you guys like the new blog design? I’m obsessed. Now with 100% more rose-red pink! And more feminist Batwoman!)


3 Comments on “On Calling People (Mitt Romney) Out”

  1. There are no words for how much I love this post. I’ll just be here cheering and high-fiving and saying HELL YEAH THIS THIS SO MUCH.

  2. Nancy Green says:

    Like you said. And how did you get the amazing video embedded into your post? The good think about being old, like I am, is that your ear for dog whistles becomes more acute by the year.


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